Funny Dutch Words

On your journey on learning Dutch (yes it is a journey, a rather large one) you will come across some ‘funny’ phrases and words. Why beat around the bush when you can be direct like a Dutch person?

Here are 15 funny Dutch words I have, so far, come across.

Prepare to be amazed.


  1. Toiletbril = toilet glasses = toilet seat.
  2. Schoonmoeder = clean mother = mother-in-law.
  3. Mierenneuker = ant fucker = someone who cares a little too much about details.
  4. Handschoenen = hand shoes = gloves.
  5. Pindakaas = peanut cheese = peanut butter.
  6. Spijkerbroek =nail pants = jeans.
  7. Brandslang = fire snake = hose.
  8. Boterham = butter ham = sandwich.
  9. Schilpad = shield toad = turtle.
  10. Oorlog = cumbersome ear = war.
  11. Ziekenauto = sick car = ambulance.
  12. Muilpeer = mouth pear = slap in the face.
  13. Vleermuis = wing mouse = bat.
  14. Wasbeer = wash bear = racoon.
  15. Apenstaartje = little monkey tail = @


Have you discovered any comical Dutch phrases and words that I have missed out on this list? Let us know in the comments.

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Katie Joy

Jewellery Designer at Uniquely You Jewellery
Katie Joy was born and raised in London and now lives in Haarlem with her partner and their two cats. Katie Joy runs her own handmade jewelry business from home and is the Editor in Chief for ExpatsHaarlem. She enjoys exploring Haarlem, trying new places to eat and drink and likes to immerse herself in the Dutch lifestyle.
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